If you know how, please let us know!
I watched part of last night’s episode of How to Look Good Naked – H.T.L.G.N. (Lifetime http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/how-look-good-naked ) and I was amazed at how quickly I was overcome with emotions. Yes, I am a blubberer! Heather was on this week, and she is a Congenital Heart Failure survivor. Is that right? She was born with the disease and lives with it to this day. From the disease, she has had many surgeries and feels uncomfortable with the scars.
While not in that extreme of health conditions, I am 31 and have had 3 surgeries since 25, 2 leaving very big scars. And the prospect of more surgeries in the future is frightening. With my spinal fusion in May 2007, I learned that once that is done, the adjacent discs tend to give out and need to be fused. So, yes, I may have more fusions in the future. I can do some things to prevent that, but it isn’t all up to me. So, I felt very much attached to Heather and her emotions about her body.
Why do we beat ourselves up? Why do we say things to ourselves that we would never dream to say to anyone else? What has prompted us to feel these things about ourselves?
I went to Michigan, the Upper Peninsula (Copper Harbor area) Labor Day weekend. It was nice and warm, very warm actually for the area, and we were able to get into Lake Superior for a swim. I never bring my bathing suit since it is NEVER warm enough for my liking. Well, I threw on some shorts and a t-shirt and walked in, freezing still (in my opinion). I adjusted quickly and enjoyed myself. Soaking up the sun on the beach I thought how I felt fine with my body. I surmised it was because I wasn’t in a suit. The next day, we had another person go, the husband of the couple we stay with. He is like my uncle and I just adore the two more than words can say. He is in his late 60’s and is very active and healthy. He runs 5 miles at least 3 times a week. On our way home, trying to outrun a big storm, we discussed body image issues. It was a wonderful discussion. He was truly interested in why women are so concerned with their bodies.
I told him that I find it sad that girls see the waifs in the magazines and want to be that, as that is touted as beautiful and desirable. Heck, not more than a 100 or 200 years ago, a voluptuous woman with some “meat on her bones” was considered desirable. It was a sign of wealth and stability. She had enough means to eat and was thus considered desirable. Why if our country, and others, are experiencing such high rates of obesity is the waif what is desirable? I guess it comes down to we want what we don’t have.
My plantar fasciitis and muscles in my calves are so flared up this week. I am trying to be more active, walking and yoga, but so much hurts this condition. I am wearing my athletic shoes with a skirt and it looks hideous (in my opinion). But, a girl has to do what a girl has to do. I went across the street to the cafeteria for lunch (I forgot to bring one with me) and as I walked past every person I imagined them all saying how stupid I must look. Why?????? I am hurting and I need my comfy shoes and orthotics that were made for athletic shoes. I can’t wear them in dress shoes. I had to wear these shoes today. So, why if it is a matter of health and physical comfort, would I ever care what others may or may not be thinking about me? Besides, it’s not like women don’t wear athletic shoes and skirts all the time downtown! Obviously, I am feeling inadequate about myself.
Guess I know what I am talking about in therapy this month! ; )
So, what are you doing to work on your body image issues? Has your journey on WW helped or hindered that growth? Do you feel hopeless that it will change? Are you one of the blessed that doesn’t experience any issues with yourself? Have you overcome them in the past, and if so, how? Can we accept ourselves and still want to lose weight?
A lot of food for thought today! Ha! Pun intended.
I have included in this post, a WW article on Body Confidence. If you haven’t seen H.T.L.G.N., I recommend viewing the show.
Also, I want to know if anyone is interested in getting together with me for a “therapy session.” I was discussing with my leader, a former member of mine, about my “therapy” meetings. I miss those. I always loved those weeks that yielded more in depth self awareness and got to the core of our weight issues. Some weeks you didn’t want to talk openly about the topics, but most of you really dived right in. So, if you would like to get together as WW members, I’d love to facilitate. Email me if you are interested and I will put something together. Again, keep in mind I have no outside training in counseling or psychotherapy. I’m just a gal that likes to get in the head and de-clutter it! I am on the search to figure out my own, and others mental barriers and successes with weight loss.
quirkysoul@sbclgobal.net
I watched part of last night’s episode of How to Look Good Naked – H.T.L.G.N. (Lifetime http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/how-look-good-naked ) and I was amazed at how quickly I was overcome with emotions. Yes, I am a blubberer! Heather was on this week, and she is a Congenital Heart Failure survivor. Is that right? She was born with the disease and lives with it to this day. From the disease, she has had many surgeries and feels uncomfortable with the scars.
While not in that extreme of health conditions, I am 31 and have had 3 surgeries since 25, 2 leaving very big scars. And the prospect of more surgeries in the future is frightening. With my spinal fusion in May 2007, I learned that once that is done, the adjacent discs tend to give out and need to be fused. So, yes, I may have more fusions in the future. I can do some things to prevent that, but it isn’t all up to me. So, I felt very much attached to Heather and her emotions about her body.
Why do we beat ourselves up? Why do we say things to ourselves that we would never dream to say to anyone else? What has prompted us to feel these things about ourselves?
I went to Michigan, the Upper Peninsula (Copper Harbor area) Labor Day weekend. It was nice and warm, very warm actually for the area, and we were able to get into Lake Superior for a swim. I never bring my bathing suit since it is NEVER warm enough for my liking. Well, I threw on some shorts and a t-shirt and walked in, freezing still (in my opinion). I adjusted quickly and enjoyed myself. Soaking up the sun on the beach I thought how I felt fine with my body. I surmised it was because I wasn’t in a suit. The next day, we had another person go, the husband of the couple we stay with. He is like my uncle and I just adore the two more than words can say. He is in his late 60’s and is very active and healthy. He runs 5 miles at least 3 times a week. On our way home, trying to outrun a big storm, we discussed body image issues. It was a wonderful discussion. He was truly interested in why women are so concerned with their bodies.
I told him that I find it sad that girls see the waifs in the magazines and want to be that, as that is touted as beautiful and desirable. Heck, not more than a 100 or 200 years ago, a voluptuous woman with some “meat on her bones” was considered desirable. It was a sign of wealth and stability. She had enough means to eat and was thus considered desirable. Why if our country, and others, are experiencing such high rates of obesity is the waif what is desirable? I guess it comes down to we want what we don’t have.
My plantar fasciitis and muscles in my calves are so flared up this week. I am trying to be more active, walking and yoga, but so much hurts this condition. I am wearing my athletic shoes with a skirt and it looks hideous (in my opinion). But, a girl has to do what a girl has to do. I went across the street to the cafeteria for lunch (I forgot to bring one with me) and as I walked past every person I imagined them all saying how stupid I must look. Why?????? I am hurting and I need my comfy shoes and orthotics that were made for athletic shoes. I can’t wear them in dress shoes. I had to wear these shoes today. So, why if it is a matter of health and physical comfort, would I ever care what others may or may not be thinking about me? Besides, it’s not like women don’t wear athletic shoes and skirts all the time downtown! Obviously, I am feeling inadequate about myself.
Guess I know what I am talking about in therapy this month! ; )
So, what are you doing to work on your body image issues? Has your journey on WW helped or hindered that growth? Do you feel hopeless that it will change? Are you one of the blessed that doesn’t experience any issues with yourself? Have you overcome them in the past, and if so, how? Can we accept ourselves and still want to lose weight?
A lot of food for thought today! Ha! Pun intended.
I have included in this post, a WW article on Body Confidence. If you haven’t seen H.T.L.G.N., I recommend viewing the show.
Also, I want to know if anyone is interested in getting together with me for a “therapy session.” I was discussing with my leader, a former member of mine, about my “therapy” meetings. I miss those. I always loved those weeks that yielded more in depth self awareness and got to the core of our weight issues. Some weeks you didn’t want to talk openly about the topics, but most of you really dived right in. So, if you would like to get together as WW members, I’d love to facilitate. Email me if you are interested and I will put something together. Again, keep in mind I have no outside training in counseling or psychotherapy. I’m just a gal that likes to get in the head and de-clutter it! I am on the search to figure out my own, and others mental barriers and successes with weight loss.
quirkysoul@sbclgobal.net
Body Confidence
· Article By: Stephanie Osfield
·
Stop making your body the target of a self-perpetuated smear campaign. A good self image makes you feel better and helps you achieve your goals. Here are some tips for giving your body confidence a boost.
Do you think your life would be so much better if you dropped one dress size, had slimmer hips or looked like Elle MacPherson? Then your body image needs a boost. "Left unchecked, a lack of body confidence can interfere with your quality of life, career and social time," says counselor Jenny Garth.
Sound familiar? Then stop beating yourself up. Looking good is all about feeling good. Here's how to get your body confidence back for keeps:
Watch your thinking.Poor body image is the result of:
Extreme thinking: "I'll never be attractive to men because my thighs are too big."
Unrealistic expectations: "I wish I could be as skinny as I was before I got married and had three children."
Jumping to conclusions: "Everyone is staring at me thinking, 'No wonder she's so big—look at the dessert she's having.'"
Exaggerating: "There's no point in buying new clothes. I look horrible in absolutely everything I wear."
To break these unkind attitudes, work on your own PR campaign. Here are some ideas:
Avoid self-criticism.Enough of that self-flagellation. "I ask women, 'Would you put down your daughter, best friend or mother this way?' Of course not—so it's obviously not OK to say these things to yourself," says Garth. In the long-term, critical self-talk can destroy self-respect, so avoid it. Instead, aim to:
Replace every negative thought with a positive one (e.g., instead of "I hate my hips," try "I have pretty eyes").
Exercise to invest in a healthier, longer life, not just to change the way you look.
Praise yourself for your efforts to reach your goal weight.
Say "thank you" to compliments, instead of putting yourself down in response.
Think beautiful: Walk, talk and relate as though you're a beautiful gazelle, and a beautiful gazelle you will be.
Stop obsessing.
Banish your scale to the garage and weigh in only at Weight Watchers meetings.
Take down all but one mirror.
Don't beat yourself up for skimping on a workout or indulging in one more cookie than you had budgeted POINTS® values for. These are the times when you learn what your weaknesses are. Just take note, and strengthen your resolve to watch out for the same situation next time.
Dress to feel great.Feeling down about how you look? Take extra care with your makeup and hair and put on an outfit that makes you feel drop-dead gorgeous. Dress to hide your figure faults and accentuate your best features by:
Avoiding too much color contrast. "If you don't break the flow of the eye from the shoulder to the floor you'll get a longer, leaner, slimmer body line," says image consultant Jenny Hanson.
Choosing fabrics like wool, crepe and polyester crepe, which drape around the body in a flattering way, "unlike stiff linens and cottons that stretch to your widest point and hang there making you look bigger," says Hanson.
Wearing tailored trousers teamed with tailored or belted jackets that loosely hug the hips and finish just below the hip line. They'll define the waist and draw attention away from your lower body.
Choosing A-line or tailored skirts that show off the curve of your leg. "These give a slimmer silhouette," Hanson explains.
Look at other women. Few resemble supermodels (and let's face it, supermodels only look that good with the help of cooks, personal trainers, makeup artists and air brushing). Most of your friends, co-workers and neighbors probably don't have a supermodel's figure, so why should you stress about being the "perfect ten"? Concentrate on improving your overall health, and your body confidence will soon soar.
No comments:
Post a Comment